A torturous wedding
by Nemesis05
Summary: What would happen after Jem proposed to Tessa in the CP? Happiness, or sadness? Love or pain? Or is life just a mixture of all? Will/Tessa
1. Chapter 1

A torturous wedding

What would happen after Jem proposed to Tessa in the Clockwork Prince? Will/Tessa

_Let me not to the marriage of true minds  
>Admit impediments. Love is not love<br>Which alters when it alteration finds,  
>Or bends with the remover to remove:<br>O no! it is an ever-fixed mark  
>That looks on tempests and is never shaken;<br>It is the star to every wandering bark,  
>Whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken.<em>_  
>(Sonnet 116)<em>

"You look fine in that dress, Miss Gray. This dress is perfect for you," Sophie said, admiringly.

This has been, what, the seventeenth dress? The eighteenth? Tessa has lost count after the tenth, and honestly, she could not really tell the difference between all these white dresses, except the fact that some of them are extra tight on the waist like this one.

"Can I at least pick a wedding dress that I can _breath_in?" Tessa asked.

"But of course, Tessa dear. Here, try this on." Charlotte replied.

It has been nearly six months since that night of celebration. Charlotte's belly has swollen significantly since then, so has Henry's over-protectiveness. She had to spend almost a day to convince Henry to let her come pick a wedding gown for Tessa. Tessa smiled involuntarily at the memory of Henry glaring disapproval at the Institute's front steps when they left on the carriage.

"No, Charlotte. I think the dress before would do. I liked that one." Tessa protested.

"Very well then, we will take that one." Charlotte said, disappointed.

On the way back to the Institute, Tessa recalled the many times she had to stand before the Council, asking for their approval. Jem was right, of course, the Council had to spend months investigating her peculiar origin. Meanwhile, they were able to marry in the mundane way. For a mundane marriage, the Council could not object, but they had to recognize it.

"It holds less power than a Shadowhunter marriage, but it is a marriage no less," Jem assured her.

Tessa wondered about Will. They have not spoken since that night. Every other night, Tessa would see Will leaving the Institute at twilight and come back just before dawn. According to Sophie, he would always come back drunk, howling like an injured animal. "At least he's not cruel, miss. He just refuses to speak to us, that's all." At the thought of Will, Tessa looked nervously towards Cecily. She had accompanied them to the bridal gown shop, yet she had kept her silence. She had this quiet sense of hostility towards her, though why, Tessa thought, why? Did she know what happened between Tessa and Will?

When they got back to the Institute, Cecily slipped a piece of paper to Tessa.

_Meet me in the west corridor at midnight._

That night, Tessa went as she was told to. She was surprised by Cecily's rapid progress of knowledge about the Institute. There, she can see her Herondale black hair stark under the witch light. Cecily waited for Tessa to approach, and wasted no time.

"Miss Gray, I'll be honest with you. The first night I've spend with you and my brother, I could already see that he loved you," she stated. Tessa widened her eyes in surprise.

Cecily continued, "Don't look at me like that. Though we've long been separated, I still know my brother. I understand that you also cared for him.

"Uh…" Tessa stuttered.

"I've seen the way you both look at each other when you thought the other couldn't see. The pain in your eyes has to stand for something, does it not?" Cecily rebutted.

Tessa was struggling for an answer when a voice howled through the corridor. It was unmistakably Will's voice. She and Cecily both looked at each other, then panicked down the corridor to find Will, with his long limbs sprawled awkwardly around him, collapsed on the floor.


	2. Chapter 2

"Will!" Tessa exclaimed. She knelt down beside Will. On him, there was the unmistakable stench of alcohol. She cannot help feeling a pang of guilt, for Will had used to claim that he drank, but he never truly did so. Now all that is left was a friendlier, but lifeless Will.

"Come on, let's get you to bed. You're embarrassing me," Cecily said gently.

Together, Tessa and Cecily dragged Will back to the West Tower. It was then that Tessa remembered that Will lived in the West Tower. Thank goodness Will had been drunk, or the conversation would have ended quite awkwardly.

With a grunt, they both threw Will on his bed. Looking down, Will's face has angles that surely were not there before. However, by carrying him, Tessa can tell that he was still quite muscular for a boy his age. Suddenly, Will's eyelid snapped open, and he snatched Tessa's hand.

"Please. Don't go," he muttered.

Embarrassed, Tessa looked for Cecily, who had slipped out of the bedroom for a while.

"I'll stay, until you're asleep," Tessa said, trying to sound reassuring.

Will's feverish blue eyes looked hurt, "This is a dream, isn't it? You would never want to be so close to me if this was real."

Tessa swallowed hard, not knowing what to answer. Touching his hand, it felt like touching a furnace, and with her hand in his, Tessa already felt like melting. She wanted to be closer, much closer to Will. She tried to suppress this thought, but Will, as if responding to her thought, rose slowly, and pulled Tessa onto the bed.

Tessa, instead, became very conscious of her surrounding. The room was characteristically messy, but she can see some letters hidden in the mess, like Will was trying to hide them, but did not want to lose them. She could not help but wonder, were those her letters?

"Tessa," Tessa relished the sensation of her name being spoken by Will. "Tessa, I don't know much about Chinese culture as much as Jem do. But as Jem's best man, I _do _know a saying, 'A friend's wife is not fool around with.'" With a sigh he continued, "Do you know how hard I try, just to stay away from you? I can't stop myself from kissing you, let alone treating you with the respect of a friend's wife. Soon, I should stop even dreaming about you."

The proximity between them was so minimal that Tessa could feel the breath of Will brushing over her face. He reeked of alcohol, but also smelled of something distinctly male, something innate and feral. Tessa tried to remember a reason to struggle against his hold, but her mind was blank.

Will looked intently at Tessa's eyes, half sober, but half painstakingly conscious. Suddenly, he pulled Tessa to him, and kissing her with violent desperation. Tessa wanted to struggle, but how, how by the Angels that she can find the mental strength to do so? She was tired, and how could she have resisted such sensual pleasure of kissing Will? Will's calloused hands caressed Tessa's neck, sending shivers down her spine. Then, he started pulling away. For air? Or for remembering Tessa's new identity? Tessa did not know, but her body was acting instinctively, and before she knew it, she was kissing Will back with the same force.

Their kiss lessened in tension, like an alcoholic slowing down on his drink just to memorize the flavor of the last bottle of wine on earth in his mouth. Then tears wetted their cheeks. Tessa can feel them rolling down, and prayed that the tear wasn't hers. The kiss slowed down, and Will slowly slid down on his bed, dreaming a restless dream.

As she travelled back to her room, a terrible realization occurred to her. What had she done? She wanted to smack herself wide-awake just for betraying Jem. Why did she not even fight against the urge to kiss Will? What has she done? Oh the frustration, the agony. Why, Tessa, do you behave as if you have no control over yourself, like a silly lovesick teenage girl?

"Tessa? Is that you?"

Jem's soft velvet voice shattered her thoughts. Turning around from her door, she saw Jem's lean figure across the corridor. She prayed, for the second time tonight, please don't let the guilt show.


	3. Chapter 3

Thanks for all the positive reviews. They are really encouraging, especially since this is my first fanfic. Please, if you have any idea how I can improve, feel free to write it. I'm all ears. Plus, if any of you know how to change the rating of a story, can you please let me know? Slight spoiler, I'm going with something bold.

_If all the world and love were young,  
>And truth in every shepherd's tongue,<br>These pretty pleasures might me move  
>To live with thee and be thy love.<em>

_-Walter Raleigh_

Jem stared intently into Tessa's eyes. Then, he gestured Tessa to "come here". Tessa willingly obliged.

Jem closed the door silently behind Tessa.

"Come, sit down. We haven't gotten to talk for so long," Jem said, taking her hands and pulling lightly her towards the bed.

"Sure," Tessa answered, trying to calm the quiver in her voice. What would they talk about, Tessa wondered, and she shifted nervously in her position.

Naturally picking her sign of nervousness, Jem asked, "Are you quite alright, Tessa? Is the preparation of the wedding giving you grief? If that's true, please _do _tell me. As your groom-to-be, I wish to share your burden."

Jem was ever so kind that Tessa had to shake her head in response.

Then slowly collecting her mind, she said, "There isn't much to do, now that the dress has been picked, the invitations sent out, and…" Tessa counted in her head the list of things to do.

"Well, I trust the wedding is in good hands," Jem briefly summarized, and waited for Tessa to reply, but she has already ran out of words.

"So… um… then…hmm… Let me put it this way, why do you still look so troubled? Is everything all right?"

That snapped Tessa back into attention, and she quickly responded, "Yes, of course. There's nothing wrong, nothing really. Why did you ask?"

"Quite frankly, I have been noticing that adorable frown on you for a while. Are you _sure _you are fine?" Jem asked skeptically.

"Yes, yes. I am as fine as ever." She hoped she was as convincing as she thought she was, but she was not.

"Don't lie to me, Tessa! I know there must be something out of place. I _know _it! I can see it in your eyes you are lying," Jem shouted. His eyes were shining a strange light.

"Wait, Jem. How much of your drug did you take this evening?" Tessa asked in concern.

"Do NOT try to change the subject!" Jem exclaimed. Taking her chin with force, he pulled her face near his. "You smell like alcohol. Do not try to deny it."

Tessa raised both her hands to protest, but it was in vain.

"Do you know how hard it is to love you? You are always so mysterious, that I can't even be sure what you have been up to!"

"Well, you know for a fact that I love you." Tessa whispered.

Jem increased the tension on his hand on Tessa's chin, and pressed his lips hard on hers.

Kissing Jem was a different sensation from kissing Will. Tessa could not help but notice that while kissing Will was like a wild fire, untamable and dangerous, kissing Jem was like a gust of wind, not without tension, but less heat and more dream-like. She chanted in her mind, don't think about Will, don't think about Will.

Slowly, Jem's hand travelled up Tessa's back. It was soothing, and Tessa felt like giving in to his touch. And what was the harm? Tessa thought. She was about to marry him anyways. What was the difference in a few weeks? Besides, it was for the better. That way she could completely take her mind off Will. There was no point in thinking of something that will not have hope, she thought to herself. Something about her aunt Harriet flashed crossed her mind, but she quickly dismissed it.

Gritting her teeth, Tessa jerked Jem closer and tried to take off his shirt awkwardly. He held her bands briefly, as if to say, let me. So she sat obediently, and simply setting her mind to continue kissing him.

Jem tore off his shirt, but took her dress off agonizingly slowly. Looking down at her soft bare body, Jem hesitated for a while, as if remembering that it was not what he would normally do. Indeed, normal Jem would not have a temper; normal Jem would not grab Tessa by her chin; and normal Jem would have never agreed to do it before their marriage. But this was Jem under the influence of Yinfen. Nothing was normal.

That night, Tessa finally felt what her novels would describe as, "over the heavens". It was no pleasure that she had felt before. It was a different kind, like a mixture between ecstasy and something that has buried deep in their consciousness. Soon, they fell asleep, feeling blissful.

_Bang, bang, bang._ The sound startled Tessa, and woke her up.

"Miss Gray? Please open the door," a familiar voice said, and Tessa was in big trouble.


	4. Chapter 4

I cannot tell you how excited I am to receive reviews! I can only compare the joy to having my baby praised while I am bring it out. I'm bursting with pride and goofiness (excuse my randomness). Alas! I will try to improve my problems.

*Almost forgot, today (12-24) I'll be killing a certain character. Be ready.

I share in the joy of my friends  
>While the air is filled with songs<br>To love, to love and a wedding  
>Blessed are the lives of friends<br>I share in their smiles quite often  
>For their humour is a narcotic<br>It infiltrates almost every thought  
>Induces many a joyful memory<p>

Excerpt from _To love and a wedding_

By Matthew Holloway

After a few frightening minutes, Sophie had left the corridor, and Tessa sneaked back to her room. Closing the door firmly behind her, she realized what she had done. She had followed the footsteps of her aunt Harriet. Not that she could possibly bear a child, but still, she and Jem had committed the deed out of wedlock. Swallowing hard, she put on her dress. Hold your head high, she thought, and she walked out of her room.

The next few days passed in a blur, every single detail of the wedding demanded her attention. Sometimes, she and Jem would sit down and talk, but no more did they do. Will was nowhere to be seen, and usually when it required his participation, he would simply hide a corner, making small talks, avoiding her completely. Maybe he thought the kiss that night was just a dream, and maybe that was for the best.

The night before the wedding, naturally it was the night for bachelor or bachelorette party. Jem had no friends, so the responsibility fell on Will, who seemed giddy the entire day for a change. The best man dragged the unwilling Henry, a confused Gideon and even poor Cyril to somewhere "only men can go". He was even singing a song about his plans.

_Hey good o'lads, think of where we are going_

_Perhaps to a casino we go_

_And spend all night gambling_

_Hey good lads, think of where are we going_

_Perhaps to a club go_

_Where they have pretty girls dancing_

_But rest assured, my lads, tonight you won't be bored_

_For we aren't coming back_

_Till all wine is poured_

"Stop it, Will. Just calm down…" Henry intercepted, but was caught mid-sentence, fascinated by his own collar.

"Have fun!" Tessa and Cecily shouted down the Institute's doorsteps. There were only she, Sophie, Cecily and Charlotte, who could not go anywhere far on foot even if she wanted, since Cyril was gone and there was no one to drive the carriage. They were stuck with the small Lycanthrope pub near the Institute.

"Four cups of beer, please!" Charlotte shouted for the bartender.

"Ma'am! You shouldn't be drinking!" Sophie protested.

"What? Of course I can!"

"No you can't, just stick with milk or something," Cecily said, turning to the bartender, "Three cups would suffice."

Tessa took one of the cups hesitantly.

"Don't be scared. It won't bite. I'm sure you'll like it," Cecily said. Tessa took a sip.

"It's bitter!" Tessa exclaimed. All her companion laughed with her at her own ignorance.

A sip followed the other, people, candlelight light and moonlight began to blur together.

Bright light was trickling through her eyelashes into her eyes, and the next thing she knew, she was in her bed back in the Institute. Oh my head, she thought. Taking a tentative step, she stretched and had to race to the bathroom. She threw up until she was spitting bile out of her mouth. Alcohol, she shook her head, never again. That must the reason why aunt Harriet said no decent woman should drink more than she needs. She quickly grabbed clothes to cover her bare body, and tried to tidy up her room, which looked like the aftermath of a struggle. What had went on in her room last night? Through her cloudy mind, she could only recall bits and pieces of really loud singing, a lot of staggering, a clockwork-like person staring and, Will? Tessa understood the first three, they were typical signs of drunkenness, but the latter part must be a dream, and a dream that she was not supposed to dream. She had to concentrate, for it is her wedding day.

She sat down and half-consciously massaged her soreness. The images of Will flooded her mind. Will looking sad yet determined. Will looking confused. Will looking like he was ready to go to hell for something. Then Tessa felt a current warming her to the tips of her being. Thinking about Will has always had that effect on her. She knew butterflies would never be sufficient for what they have. She bit her lips and corrected, what they almost had.

Tessa felt that she must have been missing something, something important. She knew with time, she will eventually remember. Something…

_Knock. Knock._

"Miss Gray, ready for your big day?"

Tessa flew the door open. Sophie and Cecily's face were a bit red, perhaps from the alcohol from last night, but she looked more freshened than Tessa herself felt like. With just a bit of breakfast, they started the agonizing preparation for the wedding. First, they concentrated on her hair, then her dress and her face. They pulled and curled until Tessa felt like all her hair were about to fall out. Then they polished and piled up powder on her face and forced her into a corset that she could barely breathe. Finally, they announced her ready.

"Something old, something new; something borrowed, something blue," Sophie muttered.

Her veil was old, for it was Charlotte's, and her clockwork angel was old as well; her wedding dress was new. Cecily had also borrowed her a blue ribbon running around her waist.

"You're good to go," pronounced Charlotte, and they all wished Tessa good luck.

Arriving at the church, Tessa started to feel very nervous. Her palms began to sweat immensely, and she had to suppress the urge to bite her nails.

"You'll be fine, Tessa. Nothing can go wrong," Charlotte said soothingly.

"Don't be so sure, Charlotte." Tessa whispered, she could barely keep down her nerves.

"Well, I _am_ sure. Shall we?" Tessa nodded, and Charlotte took her hand, and led her into the church. Tessa had no family left, and since Charlotte was the only person that Tessa felt like a parent figure, she was to bring her down the aisle.

Nice and easy, Tessa thought. Walking down the aisle whilst most of the Enclave, people who had slaved hundreds and thousands of demons, it was nerve wrecking. The only thing that kept her steady was Jem, who was looking exactly like an angel, radiating light and hope.

Arriving at the altar, the priest started the long ceremony, but Tessa paid no attention to it. She was preoccupied, looking into Jem's eyes, and was smiling in utmost content.

"Should anyone here present know of any reason that this couple should not be joined in holy matrimony, speak now or forever hold your peace," the minister said.

"I object!" A voice exclaimed.

Tessa was confused. She looked at Will. He was looking pale, but he held his tongue.

Then, the door to the church flew wide open.


	5. Chapter 5

Dear Readers,

Please forgive me for skipping today's update, but IT'S CHRISTMAS!

No, I'm serious, I'm a Catholic, and so a good Catholic should go to church and kick back and relax! (Ok, maybe not the later part)

Whether you are Catholic or Atheist, boy or girl, fat or skinny, corny or horny, take a day off and just celebrate LIFE! (unless you are a vampire, which doesn't really count, I'm sorry)

Isn't it awesome to be living, have a computer and can read to your heart's content?

Merry Christmas/Hanukka/any-other-festival-that-sounds-religious

Nemesis xoxo


	6. Chapter 6

I've almost forgot, I have to apologize for not updating the day before yesterday. I've broken my promise of updating every day, and I'm sorry. Please know that your review is making a certain slightly crazy girl very happy. So here we go.

Our death is our wedding with eternity.

What is the secret? "God is One."

The sunlight splits when entering the windows of the house.

This multiplicity exists in the cluster of grapes;

It is not in the juice made from the grapes.

For he who is living in the Light of God,

The death of the carnal soul is a blessing.

Regarding him, say neither bad nor good,  
>for he is gone beyond the good and the bad.<p>

By Rumi

Mortmain.

For a moment, he stayed standing there as if he was frozen. Light and wind were spilling into the church behind him, so that his white hair was glistening and flying in the air. He looked like a formidable marble statue, radiating a white aura of invincibility.

"I object," he paused, looking at the Shadow hunters assembled like a tycoon counting his money. "Because this creature, by the name of Theresa Gray, is mine."

"No!" Jem shouted back. "She is not yours. You have no right!"

"Hush, little Nephilim. Feisty, aren't you, talking to me with that attitude?" he walked as swift as a ghost towards Jem. Before any shadow hunter could stop him, he took Jem's face in his hand, like a master glaring at his disobedient pup. "I would have more respect for me if I were you. How is your _yinfen_ habit going? You do realize that I control most of the yinfen supply of England."

"It is not what we are, but what we do that defines us," he replied defiantly. While he spoke, he reached down to his cane, twisted the blade out, and stabbed upwards; with speed so fast it was nearly impossible to see. Almost as quickly, Mortmain grabbed his blade, and twisted it along with Jem's hand on it, and stabbed it back towards Jem. Upon impact, Jem was tossed backwards a bit, and slowly, Tessa watched him fall like a rag doll.

"NO!" Will exclaimed. He and Tessa both rushed to Jem, and he caught him before Jem's body reached the floor. Then all hells break loose.

"You're a monster!" Tessa screamed.

"Where did he stab you? SHOW ME!" Will yelled at Jem.

"Out in the church yard!" Charlotte and Henry rose from their seat, as figures, apparently clockwork monsters, appear through the opened door.

The Lightwoods, the closest family with the most able bodies, dashed up the altar and fought Mortmain. However, Mortmain did not even appear stressed, he was at ease, smirking as he battled Benedict, Gabriel and Gideon alternatively.

"It's no use, my sword penetrated my liver. I am sure of it." Jem whispered lowly. The color on his face was slowly draining, but his eyes were still shining its bright grey flame. His eyes were looking to the heavens, and as if out of some revelation, he slowly, and gently, grabbed Tessa, Will, together with his own, and put the three hands on Tessa's belly. But what does that mean? Tessa was puzzled, but somehow through Will's frown, he seemed to have understood.

"Fight… for me," and Jem's hand weakened, but Tessa held on.

"NO! You still have hope!" Tessa sobbed, but even when the words left her lips, she knew they ceased to be true.

"Tessa, let go," Will whispered, and he plucked Tessa's small hands from Jem's long fingers.

They took a quick look at their surrounding. The Lightwoods were soon to be defeated, with Benedict looking dazed by the wall, Gabriel clearly injured in one arm and Gideon barely holding out on his own. It appears that Mortmain had brought all of his clockwork monsters with him, and that forced all the other shadow hunters to evacuate the church to the outside to battle them. Mortmain was like a whirling tornado, and he was holding a pair of knives in his hands, slashing through the air. He quickly overpowered Gabriel, and pushed him across the floor.

"Gabriel!" Gideon shouted, and in his moment of distraction, he was disarmed by Mortmain.

Will and Tessa looked at each other, and a kind of understand passed through them.

Will whispered, "I'll do my best." Then, he extracted one of his seraph blades hidden in his best man suit, and disappeared into thin air.

"MORTMAIN!" Tessa shouted. To her surprise, her voice was louder and clearer than she expected, and she sounded more confident than she felt.

"Yes, my dear." His voice was as calculating as a serpent's.

"I am here. Take me if you can."


	7. Chapter 7

As you know, this fanfic, a firstborn of mine, is ending. I'll continue writing, of course, so feel free to give me any comment for improvements or what next should I write. I've fallen in love with writing, so please help me continue this dream. Again, thanks for all your comments. It makes me very, very, very, VERY happy (maybe too happy for my family's ears' sake), but you get what I mean.

"O, how this spring of love resembleth  
>The uncertain glory of an April day;<br>Which now shows all the beauty of the sun,  
>And by and by a cloud takes all away."<p>

_The Two Gentlemen of Verona (I, iii, 84-87)_

Finishing off with the Lightwoods, Mortmain had his full attention on Tessa. This is just great, she thought, the complete attention of a mentally unstable villain. Well, at least that bought some precious time for Will to do what he had to do. Not knowing what she should say under this dramatic moment, she said, "We're through with the lies, you and I."

"Yes, dear. We're done with them," Mortmain said quietly, with the look of a lustful man, which sent shivers down Tessa's spine. "You are mine, shape-shifter. No matter how many tricks you think you have on me, you are mine."

"Then, please at least give me some answer," Tessa begged.

"To what?" he asked.

"Answer to my origin. What am I? Who were, or are, my parents? And what part did you have in my birth?" Tessa drilled.

"You? Ha! You're just a worthless hybrid of a higher demon and a Nephilim," he said. "You alone, in your kind can procreate, and _that_ is your value to me. You have been chosen to give birth to my children, and together, we shall rule all that is living."

"You're speaking of madness. I would never sleep with you! I am not a whore!"

"But you _are_. Look at your _friends_, haven't you already done the deed with both of them?"

"You are lying!" Tessa shouted.

"Silent! You_ will_ obey me, warlock!" Mortmain shouted angrily at Tessa. She recoiled, but then she remembered all the lessons she had took, and she quickly picked up a sword from one of the fallen shadow hunters, and she charged at Mortmain. He was surprised.

"My creation standing against me?" he asked himself, and he backed up to the altar.

Before Tessa could reach Mortmain, Will appeared behind Mortmain, and with a violent slash, Mortmain's white head was gone, leaving a bloody trail on the altar as it rolled off the stairs.

"It is over," Will said, and Tessa knew it was true. They went back to Jem's side, and watched as he drew his final breath.

That day, the Onclave had lost much. Though Mortmain and his clockwork army were defeated, the victory was bitter. Without much celebration, they returned to the Institute in silence.

A week later, it was Jem's funeral, along with a few shadow hunters. This time, Tessa was permitted to go along, as she was his wife-to-be. The entire ceremony was solemn and simple, lack of the complicated mundane ceremonies. Jem was gone, she thought grimly, he would not be there when Will had made her upset, he will not be there to be her comfort and support. He will not be there anymore. At that thought, she started to sob and rocked back and forth uncontrollably, and an arm grabbed hold of her and helped her way out of the gloomy city of bones. It was Will, she could tell by his smell. She was starting to see sunlight.

"Will, you can let go of me now. I am fine," Tessa whispered.

"No, you are not. Now sit down, for goodness' sake," said Will, impatiently. "In the name of Raziel, can't you care for anyone other than yourself?"

He put her down gently on a smooth boulder, and sat opposite her on another boulder, distancing himself from her.

"But I don't have anyone else to care for," Tessa rebutted. "And what does me sitting down has to do with caring?"

Will cupped his forehead with his hand, and said, "Don't you remember that night?"

"What night? The night at the ball?"

"No," he said, trying to continue with obvious effort. "The night… after the bachelor party, the night that we…"

"We, what? What did we do?" Then a horrible sense of realization came over Tessa. "We didn't. It was just a dream."

"Don't you get what Jem meant by holding our hands together over your… belly?" Will was stuttering. It was so unlike Will that Tessa knew he had to be telling the truth.

Reaching her hand down her belly, she tried to feel for any sign of life. "But it is impossible!" Tessa exclaimed.

"But it's NOT! Mortmain would not have lied to a person he was sure to possess." Will looked pained, but he continued, "It was reasonable for you and Jem, because you were betrothed. But me and you?"

He waited for a long pause and said, "It is my fault. I have betrayed my parabatai. Now, you're my responsibility, and I WILL take care of you and the baby." He took Tessa's hands, and stared into her eyes with those blue eyes of his. "Tessa, I know this is not the best time but, would you marry me? Come with me, to Idris or to Wales, wherever you want. We can spend our lives together, free from any curse, from any harm. We can raise the baby together, give him or her the best care it can have."

"Will… I don't know what to say…"

"Then say yes." He eyes were burning feverishly, so much that it reminded her of… of Jem. Her heart sank at that thought.

"I can't, I can't do that. Not when Jem just…"

He dropped his head, then slowly said, "Then I'll wait for you. No matter how long the wait is, I'll wait for you. I'll come back when you're ready."

Standing up determinedly, he said, "Three years."

"Wha… what?"

"The Chinese tradition is that when your loved ones passed away, you would need three years of mourning."

Three years sounded like a long time without either Will or Jem. Perhaps Will was right, Tessa thought, I DO need some time to prepare, to open her heart, to love again.

"I'll wait for you," Tessa said.

"And I you."

With that, Will walked quietly away, so quietly that he made no sound that all. A shadow hunter's kind of quiet.

*Epilogue: tomorrow (I'll try my best)


	8. Chapter 8

You all have to understand how saddening this is. I can't believe this piece is coming to an end, so is this year. It makes you wonder how time flies. Well, we humans cannot pursue immortality itself, but to seek immortality within memories. (I'm feeling really touchy, ok?) Again, please give me any suggestion on how to improve, and also, if you wanna read fanfic on other books, movies or even songs, write it to me on the reviews or give me a private messaging. I'll sure to do my best. Here it goes, the epilogue.

If my dear love were but the child of states,

It might for Fortune's bastard be unfather'd'

As subject to Time's love or to Time's hate,

Weeds among weeds, or flowers with flowers gather'd.

No, it was builded far from accident;

It suffers not in smiling pomp, nor falls

Under the blow of thrilled discontent,

Whereto the inviting time our fashion calls:

It fears not policy, that heretic,

Which works on leases of short-number'd hours,

But all alone stands hugely politic,

That it nor grows with heat nor drowns with showers.

To this I witness call the fools of time,

Which die for goodness, who have lived for crime.

Sonnet 124

It has been exactly three year since the fall of Mortmain. Tessa was beginning to count the days till Will's promised return. She had not seen him since that day he left the funeral, though occasionally, she would hear news about him, slaughtering a doomsday monster in Antarctica, stopping a mayhem in India, but never in England. In fact, all his doings were never even close to Britain. He was a hero, admired by many, and these years she had become a mother.

A few weeks after the funeral, it was apparent to everyone that she was pregnant. Brother Enoch had pronounced she was going to deliver a pair of twins. However, to her relieve, the shadow hunters never really asked her who the father was. Charlotte and Henry had kept her under their roof, becoming a pair of over-protective godparents. In these few years, Tessa had repetitively her worth in the Institute, leading the investigation effort of the cousil, and she tried to raise her children in the London Institute.

Looking in the mirror, she can see her body and face that used to slight, becoming more swollen. Only her eyes seemed the same, she hoped Will would still have some clue who this woman is.

She straightened her dress, tried to summon an authoritarian-like face, and headed out her room. Almost immediately as she stepped out the corridor, she heard a scream and knew she needed it.

She hurried down to the dining room and her heart was pounding. "William? Harriet? Where are you?"

"Up here, mother!" The little boy said, dangling upside-down the curtains.

"William, you get right down here." He descended, obviously unwillingly. Together with him, a girl climbed down shakily down.

"WHAT in the angel's name are you doing with your sister?" She stared straight into his eyes.

"Nothing, I swear." But his eyes were too wide; she thought bemusedly, he could not lie as convincingly as his father. He had Will's blue eyes, but somehow, with the mixture of Tessa's shape shifting genes, the moment they took him under the afternoon sunlight to examine, his hair turned miraculously golden, like a ray of sunshine. His twin sister, on the other hand, looked vaguely oriental, with ink black hair and high cheekbones, but her had unmistakably, Tessa's grey eyes.

"It's not my fault," she said in her high shrill.

"Get dressed, we're leaving for the city of bones soon." It was the day of victory, and the day of death. She knew it was mundane of her, going to commemorate Jem every year, but she could not bear the thought of Jem truly leaving her, leaving them. After spending some moment in a quiet corner of the silent city, she was about to leave with the twin when she saw a figure in the corner of her eye. Alarmed, she whirled around and saw no one. Was it Will, she pondered, had he finally come back? Now, as a mother of two, was she ready for Will? For a thing, she did not know any other time she could be more ready. She was much more mature, compared to when she first came to England. The presence of Harriet was a constant reminder of Jem, but the reminder no longer brought a jab of pain. Instead, it brought back a gentle kind of sweetness, and Jem was in the past. Yes, she thought, I am ready.

"Mommy, are you alright?" Harriet's big wide eyes starred at Tessa.

"Yes, I'm fine dear." She hugged her in one arm, William in the other, and there was her little family and almost her whole world.

In one sunny afternoon, Tessa had let her children loose in the Institute's yard. Soon they were running around together with Henry Jr., and she was watching them from a distance.

Suddenly, a person appeared out of nowhere, and was approaching her. It was… Will? The dark hair and pale complexion… it had to be. She rushed towards him, and it WAS Will. He looked like he has aged at least ten years, when in fact, he had only left for three years. He was smiling sadly, but she grinning at him. Together, they embraced, and Will's lips found Tessa's. Tessa forgot about the children for the first time in years, and kissed him back.

Slowly, she realized the infernal racket of the children had ceased. Releasing Will, she saw that the twins were running towards them. Will looked slightly puzzle, then his frown was gone and understood.

"Our children?" he asked. She found it hard to speak, so she nodded.

"Daddy!" She did not know how the twins knew, but maybe they knew in their blood they were somehow part of Will as well Jem and Tessa.

Both kneeling down, Will and Tessa held the twins, close to their hearts. Tessa felt a kind of relieve, one that came a bit late, but came none the less. Deep in her heart, Tessa knew that a torturous chapter of her life had finally ended, and a new and hopeful one had just begun.

~End~


	9. Announcement

Okay, I've decided to write a sequel. Of course, it'll have to be after the exams. (The work is literally killing me!) But I really, REALLY miss writing, so please, tell me about YOUR ideas for the sequel.

Love,

Nemesis

P.S. If you'd like me to write about another series, or even switch out of the romantic genre, let me know. I love a good challenge. :D


End file.
